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Weird Gym Characters

I went to the gym late last night. I prefer to work out late at night, because the place is much less maddening after, say, 10pm, and the people who are there tend to be much more serious about their workouts (and less serious about using the gym as social club).

But there are some unusual characters in there late at night. For example, there are a handful of obviously gay guys who think it's really cool to wear skin tight clothing, including skin-tight shorts that are shorter than those things the Magic-Bird-Dr J-era NBA players used to wear! You can see most people averting their gaze, trying to avoid visual contact, but occasionally a glimpse comes through. Ugh!

You also get the folks who just can't do without their cell phones. They often wear those groovy headsets that plug into the phone, so they can talk with full range of motion. Never mind, of course, that if you are TALKING, you aren't concentrating on your workout, and it kind of defeats the purpose. These people are PLUGGED IN. VERY IMPORTANT. Or something.

So there was this woman last night on a machine across from me just chattering away. I paid no attention to her, because I just figured that she was wearing one of those cellphone headsets. But at some point, she made so much noise I couldn't ignore her, and I discovered she WASN'T wearing a headset. She was just talking to herself. And to anyone else who would listen. Loudly.

And what was she saying? She was OBSESSING over gym hygiene -- describing in detail how she covered her gym towel with an antibacterial spray, and that she wiped her machines before AND after she used them, because otherwise bacteria can spread. Over and over and over she said this. The first three times, it was kind of amusing. After that, it was time to crank up my MP3 player (which I usually don't use when I'm doing weight training).

Of course, she WAS right -- the gym is a very germy place. But some things are best left unsaid. And they are certainly best left unsaid hundreds of times, loudly, to nobody in particular.

[Posted at 16:20 CST on 07/02/02] [Link]

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